Trashing the Dress is Just Plain Trashy.

Some of you may have heard about a fairly new bridal trend called “trashing the dress”. If you haven’t heard about it, I’ll lay it down for you. It’s pretty simple. The bride gets married. She takes some pictures and maybe goes to her reception. Then, she fucking ruins her brand new beautiful dress. That’s right. She destroys the dress.

It stands to reason that the bride spent at least a couple of hours finding this delightful little number. More than likely she paid anywhere from several hundred to several thousand dollars purchasing it. I have such a hard time understanding how someone would want to ruin what they searched so hard to find.

Apparently, some people see this as some sort of performance art. How avant garde! I’ve heard of people hanging the actual soiled dresses in their homes. Some want their photographers to document the trashing so that they can prove to future generations just how badass they were. “That’s right, Sophie. Grandma spent $5,000 on a Vera Wang wedding gown, but was enough of a rock star to destroy it after!”. It’s kind of akin to a musician smashing his/her guitar. I get the sentiment behind it, but it always makes me sad to see a a beautiful instrument in pieces. Perhaps I feel the same way about the dress since I’ve spent nearly a third of my life in the wedding business. I bleed silk and tulle, so this hurts my soul a bit.

The other thing that I hate about this is that it just seems so bratty. It’s no secret (if you’ve even read the title of this blog) that I find some of today’s brides to be a little spoiled and entitled. I think a lot of the wedding shows on TV today are showcasing and glamorizing a certain type of bitchy behavior. The Bridezilla certainly makes for good ratings. Unfortunately a lot of that has translated to the real world, as average brides try to emulate these wastes of humanity. I have seen a real uptick in this type of attitude since these wedding “reality” shows have become popular. I see trashing the dress as the ultimate example of this concept. These women are basically bragging that they have the means to waste thousands of dollars, which is really shitty in this economy. It’s like burning $100 bills during the Great Depression. There are people who are struggling to eat, and you’re destroying a beautiful gown? Did it ever occur to these brides that they could donate the dress to a woman in need? Maybe someone who began to plan her wedding and then lost her job, making her dream dress out of reach? I find it really difficult to fathom wasting a commodity like that when there are people who would be thrilled to wear it. How about a charity like Brides Against Breast Cancer, which not only benefits brides on a budget but gives the proceeds to cancer patients? Trashing the dress is just a trend I can’t get behind, even if it is (supposedly) for the sake of art.

In the end, the gown belongs to the woman who buys it. She’s allowed to do what she wants with it. I just hope that this is a fad which is on its way out. When so many are struggling, it seems like a cruel and unnecessary extravagance.

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6 Responses to Trashing the Dress is Just Plain Trashy.

  1. i totally agree. i love my dress so much i couldn’t imagine trashing it! but i guess when you’re a spoiled brat who can get more, you don’t care much about the possessions you worked hard to get.

  2. Mackenzie says:

    How many people actually give their dresses to charity or reuse them though? Reality is, most just get shoved in the back of a closet where the moths eventually find them.

  3. Your probably right, Mackenzie, which make me sad. All that beauty goes to waste. I know some women who have given their gowns away. Others have the gowns preserved so that they can save them for their daughters (although how many of us actually wear our mom’s dresses?).

    • SydneyNicollette says:

      My mother’s wedding dress isn’t my personal style, but it’s gorgeous and a perfect fit, and I was actually able to use it for a costume contest (Sarah’s Ballgown from “Labyrinth”).

  4. Amie says:

    Shows you how out of touch I am with current wedding culture – I had NO idea this even existed! I had intended to keep mine forever, and had it preserved in a box, but then I got divorced. I eventually donated it to a friend to make a Zombie film with – (still in conceptual phases). I mean, that’s *kind of* trashing the dress, but I consider it “donating to the arts” instead. πŸ™‚

    Oh! And I rescued my mom’s from destruction after her & my dad got divorced. I still have it! And its little pillbox bridal veil.

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